What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman


What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman


The huge popularity of #YesAllWomen hashtags on Twitter has created a new space for important and ongoing conversations about the daily dose of sexism that all American women deal with every day. While women "complain" about the microaggression, implicit bias, and sexism they face every day, some men continue to express skepticism, but women's experiences speak for themselves, and labels continue to provide a window into these experiences and needs that they are taken seriously.



Male privilege dictates that there are things that men don't have to think about before venturing into a public place. When I ask young men about their dress choices, they often show confusion, asking them if they experienced the same moments as women when assessing how much street harassment their clothes might have generated that morning. In fact, according to a recent report, nearly two-thirds (65%) of women have experienced street harassment, while 41% have experienced aggressive forms of harassment.



What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman



This becomes more challenging as the East Coast warms up because higher temperatures require less clothing. Less clothing usually means an increase in daily harassment – but it shouldn't be. Everyone should be able to move around in public without harassment. Any harassment, even if it's minor or just annoying, is something we need to address.


From morning to night, sexism and discrimination permeate culture in ways large and small, dominating choices and influencing action. Here's a quick summary of a typical American urban woman's day.


1. 7:00 a.m. — Wake up and pick an outfit.


What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman



The first thing most women do before heading out in the morning is to assess whether they are dressed "appropriately. "Businesses and schools across the country have come under fire for suggesting that women's bodies are somehow shameful or unprofessional dress codes, and it's no wonder why most women can't simply get dressed and go outside.


Recently, a Nebraska federal judge advised female employees not to dress like "ignorant sluts," and got themselves into trouble. Judge Richard Kopf, describing one of his clerks, said: "She was talented, well-written, eloquent, enthusiastic but not excessive, always ready to treat others with courtesy and respect, including her opponents, she wore short skirts and plump, especially appreciating the latter two attributes."”


The problem here is not that women dress inappropriately in the office or school, but that men and boys are given passes simply because they "can't control themselves. "If we demand professionalism and respect from men and boys, with consequences for those who do not adhere to these fundamental principles of human dignity, then there is much we can do to reduce gender discrimination against women in the workplace.


2. 9:00 a.m. — Leave the apartment.



What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman


Street harassment is finally getting the national attention it deserves, especially in Brooklyn, New York, where I'm located. As the national report on street harassment shows, most women have experienced street harassment in their lives: "23% have been sexually contacted, 20% have been followed, and 9% have been forced to have sex. ""A quarter of men also reported harassment, and LBGT men are more likely to be harassed than heterosexual men.


In 2010, I stopped working out at the gym to avoid sexual harassment while walking. I'm called a bitch when I respond to a hello, when a man wants more than just a hello, and when I completely ignore explicit comments, I'm called a bitch, pretending to do the same thing as any other woman to listen to music. When I was in my early 20s, a man approached me and commented on how we had the same model phone. I said, "Okay," and turned to walk away, but he grabbed my hand and started dragging me up the block, asking me to talk to him. It sounds scary, but my experience wasn't unique, and the Stop Street Harassment report ultimately confirmed what a lot of women reported on sites like Hollaback! Years.


"There's a lot of misinformation and misconceptions about what street harassment is," Stop Street Harassment founder Holly Kearl said in a recent interview. "A lot of people think of the stereotype of a woman in a short skirt passing by a construction site, but it's much more than that. This does have a negative impact on the lives of the harassed.”


3. 10:00 a.m — Take public transportation to work.



What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman


According to the Stop Street Harassment report, 23% of street harassment occurs when people take public transportation such as buses and subways. As a long-time New Yorker, I've been groped many times that men always seem to find their way around you, whether it's on a crowded subway, walking up and down station steps, or even on an empty subway.


The old-school notion that street harassment only happens to women around construction workers is masked by the fact that sexual harassment is everywhere. When so many Americans are unable to move freely in public places, we have a serious problem.


4. 2:00 p.m. — Interact with colleagues.



What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman


Male interpretation, when men explain to women what they already know, is rooted in the belief that men are more knowledgeable than women. Women at all levels have to deal with masculinity, whether at work, at home, or anywhere in between.


Secretary of State Hillary Clinton had to deal with a full day of masculinization when she testified before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee in January.In a room of sometimes hostile and condescending men, Clinton took a lesson that all American women could take. Of course, at certain appropriate times, colleagues who happen to be male will explain things to other colleagues who happen to be women – this is not called male interpretation, It's just a collaborative work environment. But men should also be able to assess whether they know a topic better than their conversation partner before they think they can control the conversation.


5. 5:00 p.m. — Attend happy hour.



What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman


Happy hours are great moments at the end of a long day at work where you can have a drink with friends and colleagues to relieve stress.Unfortunately for too many people, happy hour can quickly become very unhappy if you have to turn down admirers.


One of the most popular tweets during #YesAllWomen campaign was,  "Girls have known from an early age that it is safer to give fake phone numbers than to turn away men."#yesallwomen。 "Recently, a young woman was stabbed to death for turning down a man's invitation to a prom.


Smartphones and more aggressive dating scenarios often mean it's no longer as simple as giving a fake number to an overly attentive bar patron. Women today often have to reject men without knowing how they will react.


However, saying "yes" is also risky. Comedian Louis C.K. recently nailed this issue to his head with an accurate description of the risky calculations women make every time they agree to go out with men.



"The courage it takes for a woman to say yes [to a man] is beyond my imagination, " the comedian wrote in his daily life. "It's crazy and unwise for a woman to promise a date with a man. How can a woman still go out with a man when you consider the fact that women are no greater threat to men than men?  We are not.1 Threat! To women! Globally and historically, we are the number one cause of injury and injury to women. We are the worst thing that can happen to them! If you're a man, imagine that you can only date a half-bear, half-lion. 'Oh, I hope this is good! I hope he doesn't do what he's going to do.'”


6. 11:00 p.m. — Travel home late at night.



What It's Really Like to Live a Day in the Life of an American Woman


After happy hour, it's time to go home. If a certain time passes, I usually jump in a taxi instead of taking the subway because the media and society are indoctrinating me to walk home alone late at night or take the subway alone. Time is dangerous for women like me.


Unfortunately, it's not always safe to take a taxi or car service either. Women have repeatedly come forward to tell stories of being harassed and even raped by taxi drivers. Meanwhile, earlier this month, an Uber driver was arrested in Los Angeles on suspicion of kidnapping a drunken female passenger. However, this is just the latest in a long list of allegations that have led some women to reconsider their car service model.


But even if the taxi or private car driver does everything right, you risk being beaten up by other people, including the police.


In 2011, two NYPD officers were acquitted of rape after being called by a taxi driver to help her get back to her apartment. The woman got drunk and, like many others, took a taxi home. The taxi driver called police to help her enter her building, but she claimed police raped her.


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